It's A Countdown. Like Beyonce's...But Better!

Thats right, Beyonce : better. So ever since I was fourteen my birthday has been bittersweet for me. My birthday is always near/ during exams so when I countdown to my birthday I'm basically counting down to exams. And now I'm turning 21.

I'm actually excited to turn 21. Twenty has been a tough year. You know; its that awkward year between being a teenager and a full adult. Now that I'm almost at this important milestone in ones life ( not quite sure why though) I find myself reflecting on my two decades here. If I could go back in time and tell the younger me something I would tell little me not to worry so much. And to probably eat more vegetables ( or something like that). I would also tell myself to enjoy being a kid more cause growing up isn't as fun as we thought it would be.

I have lived and seen places that most people only dream of in my seemingly long ( but not actually) life. I've eaten chips with yourhurt, dirt and ants ( they're sour). I've danced in the rain and played in the London snow. I've seen what the world looks like through my fuzzy/blurry vision and I've seen it in high definition with my contact lenses ( amaze's me every time). I've made friends for life and lost friends that I  never thought I would in my life.  I've loved, I've stumbled; I've failed and  I've succeeded. I've cried, and smiled; never broken my bones but I've gotten stitches. I've been short and tall. I've been bald and had long hair. I've had everything and nothing.

But most of all I've laughed. And sometimes all you can really do is laugh. Like when you write a test and everyone comes out laughing cause you all know you just failed. Haha. And through it all I've been blessed.

Graduating from being a kid!

So heres to counting down to exams and my birthday. 9 DAYS...it better be awesome. Or else.
Stay fresh!

Sinister!!!!

You know I love to list things, right? Well the other day I was in the cafeteria observing a rabid looking pigeon and I thought to myself " Pigeons are so sinister. Ew.". This then lead me to think of all the things in this world that I think are sinister, where sinister means ominous/ dodgy. As you go through this list I'm sure you will also find yourself realizing how sinister these seemingly ordinary things are.

1. Pigeons: Its no secret that I don't like them, but what makes them sinister is that I've never seen a baby pigeon. SINISTER!! Where are they, huh?
2. Mushrooms. Okay so maybe you're thinking "What?" but lets just think about this for a minute. Mushrooms just pop up over night without any warning.Why do they have to be sneaky and Grow at night? SINISTER! Read Sylvia Plath's poem "Mushrooms" and then get back to me.
3. Ants. Dont like them. They're always creeping around like they own the place. Why are they so quiet? SINISTER! They can swim too, so thats weird.
4. The 'Tooth Fairy'. What does he/she want with my teeth? Like honestly though? Did the tooth fairy give my teeth to other little boys and girls?  [reduce, reuse, recycle!].
5. Have you ever noticed that there are no clocks in the library? I think that's sinister. They wanna keep you there forever.
6. CATS!!! Sinister creatures. I don't like how they come and go as they please and they creep. They only come back to you when they want food. And according to my sources they release a pheromone that causes depression! Yeah, I know right?!

FOUND IT ON THE INTERNET

And this is only the beginning of the list! There are many more sinister things out there...
* disclaimer: I'm sure there are some reasonable explanations for all these sinister things in this world but it doesn't make them any less sinister!*


That was a lovely list, don't you think? I feel like I just dropped some knowledge on you. So now you cant say that futcHAHA child never taught you anything!

With My Head Held High I'll Buck Alone, If It Breaks My Body or Breaks my bones!

So, whats up with everybody? Whats the 411? What has everybody been up to? What's the hot gossip? Tell me everything. What have you guys been listening to? What are the cool jams? HAHA, gotta love mean girls.

But seriously how have the hols [ dont you hate people who unnecessarily shorten words?] been? What did you do last weekend? Do you wanna know what I did? Cleaned up dead animals that my cousins' dogs had killed. Yep, they just kept pilling up. It literally took us like 30 minutes to clean up one of their unfortunate victims cause we were scared to go near it. Hehe. We're suuuuch girls.
They're hunting dogs, so its in their nature. But you know how dogs are: They feel the need to bring you everything they have found so they can show you, like you should be proud. Ugh. I was traumatized.

Have you ever noticed that when its the holidays and you're really hungry and you go to the fridge and you don't find anything to eat and then you leave the kitchen then two minutes later you're back like the contents of the fridge will have changed by then. Lol. I feel like that didn't really make a lot of grammatical sense but you get the point, right? Even if you don't, just act like you do. I've noticed that it also happens with holiday TV viewing cause I'll scroll through all the channels looking for something to watch and not find anything bit then a few seconds later I scroll through the exact same channels still not finding anything to watch. Sigh.

Okay. Thats all I have to say.Stay fresh boys and girls!

 futcHAHA child out! (still works for me!)

My Chain Hits My Chest When I'm Banging on the Dashboard

People say that I'm strange like the clouds B.o.B and Lil Wayne see but that's beside the point of this post. You know sometimes there are just some things in life that just irritate you? Usually the things you have no control over like when the weather suddenly changes and you're left standing there in the rain with not even Rihanna's umbrella ( ella-ella) to cover you. So here are some the things that just get on my nerves:

Don't you hate it ...

•  When you write someone a Long and thoughtful sms and all they reply with is "cool" or "okay
• When people talk loud in lectures and then think they're whispering, Yeah, um no! We can all hear you!!
• When a new lecturer comes in and the first thing he says is "I'll assume you remember this form last year". Well then is it safe for me to assume that you remember what you had for breakfast this time lat year. Yeah that's what I thought.
• You have 4 exams in a row then like a week 'till the last one. I mean really. Who comes up with these exam time tables? They hate us.
• When you go over to you friends house and they have crazy dogs barking at you. The're all like" Dont worry, he doesnt bite!" While the dog is pracrically frothing at the mouth and can hardly be restrained.
• When its windy and you're wearing a dress ( am i right boys?).
• When your computer/ phone is being mean and just wont listen to you, then in anger you hit it against the wall and it has the audasity to break!!
• When you're studying and you say to yourself "That probably wont come up in the test, so I'll just skip it" and then it turns out to be 20% of your paper. Touche` examiner. Touche`.
• When I'm singing and people feel the need to join in. No! This is not a duet. This is not glee. I'm a solo artist ( solo you cant hear me. boom!)
• When people sing aloud in public. Come on! This is not glee and unless I'm paying to hear you sing I dont want to. This aint Glee. Just kidding : D (not really though. but hey I do it too *see point above*).

Yeah thats all I wanted to say. Phew. Just had to get that off my chest. Can you relate to any of these points above? I can ( well, I did make the list but you know what I mean) but you know there are just some things in life that we cant control like the way the leaves change colour in the winter. And bed head. And the size of your head. And why pegions move their heads when the walk ( does tha freak anyone else out? Rats of the sky, I tell you.).  There is one thing you can do though. Share this blog. Like this post. Tweet this. Tell your friendsa nd their friends.Tell a stranger! Wait, no. No pause that. Idont endorse talking to strangers.

@futcHAHAchild out ( yeah, that still works!)

p.s. the title of this post really has nothing to do with it. I just cant get that song out of my head.